“o’’ god make me child again !

 

Technorati Tags: GOD,NATURE,CHILD,CHILDHOOD,ADULT,SCHOOL,COLLEGE,TENSION,PLAY

SO MUCH TO STUDY…. COLLEGE SUFFOCATING ENVIRONMENT… FAMILY  RESPONSIBILITIES….. FUTURE EXPECTATIONS…. THESE ARE THINGS OF THIS ADULT LIFE.

THIS DAY I’M SITTING AT THE BANK OF GANGA….CONTEMPLATING MY CHILDHOOD DAYS.

OH ! WHAT WAS THOSE DAYS ! NO TENSION OF STUDY… NO RESPONSIBILITIES…NO FUTURE EXPECTAIONS… ONLY THING THAT WAS PRESENT WAS ‘PRESENT’.

I REMEMBER THE DAYS WHEN I ALONG WITH MY FRENDS…PAPPU, IQBAL,BHULAN,MINTU,GUDIYA, PINKU,RUKHSANA…LIST IS LONG…USED TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK IN MILKY MOONLIGHT… THERE WAS NO DISTINCTION OF BOYS AND GIRLS THAT TIME..NOW THERE IS A FALSE BARREIER OF BOYS & GIRLS WHICH OUR CULTURE HAVE GIVEN US AS A PUNISHMENT OF BEING ADULT.

THOSE TIMES PLAY WAS SO NATURAL ! …NO TENSION OF WINNING OR LOSSING.. NO JEALOUSY FOR ANY ONE..NO BAD FEELING ABOUT ANY ONE… WE QUARREL..BUT ONLY FOR THAT MOMENT…

NOW THINGS ARE DIFFERENT… WE PLAY TO WIN..WE PLAY TO MAKE SOMEONE LOSE.. WE HAVE BAD FEELING ABOUT THE OPPOSITE PLAYERS… WE BECOME SO TENSE ABOUT OUR WINNINGS THAT WE LOSE THE REAL AND NATURAL SPRIT OF PLAYING…

THOSE WERE THE DAYS WHENE WE USED TO GO TO SHCOOLS… OUR DAILY GOINGS AND COMMINGS WAS A TOUR TO ANOTHER LAND… LAND WHERE LEARNING WAS JUST PLAY..WE PLAY..WE LEARN…WE LEARN WE PLAY…LEARNING WAS NO TENSION …THERE WAS NO TENSION OF  FAILING OR PASSING OR HAVING GOOD GRADES… IF WE GET GOOD MARKS,,,OK,,,IF WE DO NOT,,,OK!

NOW GOING COLLEGE IS NOT FUN… IT DOESN’T SEEMS LIKE TOURING TO ANOTHER WORLD WHERE EVERY THING WAS JUST PLAY.. NOW GOING TO COLLEGE MEANS TAKING TENIONS OF THE CLASSROOM ENVIRONMENT..OUR DRESSING..SEEING WETHER WE ARE LOOKING SMART OR NOT..HAVE WE PREPAIRED OUR PREVIOUS NOTE OR NOT…WETHER NEHA,,,RAJNI,,TINA..MEENA..AND LIKE THAT WILL LIKE ME IN THIS DRESS OR NOT..WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF TEACHER WOULD ASK ME QUESTION…WHAT IF I WOULD NOT ANSWER…THERE ARE MANY OTHER “WHAT IF” WE TAKE TENSION OF.

I REMEMBER THOSE BEAUTIFUL MOMENT OF OUR CHILDHOOD…MY PARENTS NEVER ASK ME ABOUT MY FUTURE...MEANS THEY NEVER ASK ME ABOUT MY PLAN OF FUTURE..CARRER.. THEY ONLY WISH ME TO BE HAPPY AT ALL MOMENTS..

NOW THIS IS THE TIME …NO ONE STILL ASK ABOUT OUR FUTURE PLAN … BUT THIS ADULTHOOD SPIRIT ALWAYS MAKE A NEW PLAN….JUDGE IT FEASIBILITY…DISCARD…MAKE NEW PLAN…AND THIS CYCLE …CONTINUE…THEN WE STICK TO A PLAN WHICH MOST SUITS US… AND AGAIN..THE TENSION..THE FRUSTRATIONS…ALLL NEGATIVE THINGS BEGINS… TENSION OF ACHEIVING OUR GOAL..OUR FEAR OF FALIURE…WHAT IF I FAIL…WHAT IF THING WILL GO WRONG..WHAT PEOPLE WILL THINK IF I FAIL… NOW AGAIN TENSION…

I AM SITTING CONTEMPLATING THOSE CHILHOOD DAYS…WHERE THERE WAS NO TENSION OF FUTURE…WE USED TO LIVE IN PRESENT.. NOW IN ADULTHOOD…WE EITHER LIVE IN PAST OR FUTURE…OUR MOST OF ‘PRESENT’ IS TENSED... SO WE ESCAPE THIS ‘PRESENT’   ….

SEEING THE WATERWAVES IN GANGA…I THINK OUR CHILDHOOD WAS JUST LIKE THIS WAVE..NO TENSION OF WHERE IT WILL GO… IT IS JUST FLOWING FOR THE SAKE OF FLOWING… OUR LIVES WAS SAME …WE WERE LIVING…JUST FOR LIVING…

SO GOD…I WANT TO GO BACK TO MY CHILDHOOD….’O’GOD! MAKE ME CHILD AGAIN.